LIVE COHORT

Rewilding Relationships

5 Weeks Hybrid Learning

part of the monogamy detox course series
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“It's very strange to regard two people as community. Where is everybody else? You know, with one person, it's hard to see very far. Two people, you can see a bit more. But if you have a whole group of people around really caring about you... it helps you fulfill your purpose."
~ SOBONFU SOME

Fairy-tale happily-ever-afters in stories, movies, and songs; hundreds of books on how to find and stay in partnership; an infinite number of self-help relationship experts on social media encouraging you that everything will be solved by finding that special someone and walking through life with them — we are inundated with the message that partnership is the solution to all our woes.

But it's not.

Partnership doesn't solve all our problems, it doesn't take away loneliness, and it doesn't always bring us closer to feeling like we are fulfilling our purpose in life.
The idea that we are destined to be in a lifelong partnership with someone, a partnership that begins with sexual chemistry and that follows an inevitable, linear trajectory, and through which you form a nuclear family, is called the "relationship escalator".

You meet, you like each other, you date, eventually you meet each other's families, move in together, maybe have kids or adopt pets, and eventually grow old together. On this escalator, you're expected to be partnered with only one other person and be together 'till death do you part.'

But the escalator doesn't work for everyone, and the nuclear family falls short when it comes to the day-to-day realities of surviving (and hopefully thriving) in a world filled with upheaval, economic challenges, political stress, war, and so much more.  Even if you have a nuclear family, faced with all this, your life may feel unstable, lacking in resources, and lonely.

What many of us yearn for are experiences of relating that go far deeper and more broadly than the Relationship Escalator or Nuclear Family can offer. We might explore different ways to broaden our relationships: mutual aid networks, cooperative housing, chosen family, and even polyamory. But we might still continue to unconsciously replicate the frameworks that are holding us back.

If you're yearning for something different than the standard offerings of Monogamy and want to cultivate experiences of liberating, equitable, and authentic relationships with multiple significant others, this course is for you.

Mel Cassidy’s Monogamy Detox is the relationship school I didn’t even know I needed so badly.

— JEN, COURSE STUDENT

5 Transformational Weeks

Rewilding Relationships builds on the work presented by Mel Cassidy in their book, Radical Relating, offering a somatically-integrated and experiential dive into weeding through the monogamous-centred mythology that puts limits on relationships. Limits like:  you can only have sex with someone you are in love with; you can only romantically love one person at a time; you have to be able to meet all of that person's needs (or there's something wrong with you); and if you share meaningful intimacy of any kind with people who aren't your partner, this is a threat to the relationship.

Together, we unpack the restrictive frameworks and stories that we may be unconsciously repeating. Through somatic practices to support greater self-awareness, we learn how to redefine our core needs and capacities in different areas of relationships. And, with trauma-informed tools, we learn how to show up with greater connection to how we exist within the greater, shared relationship ecosystem.

Over the course of five weeks, you'll come to learn a liberatory framework that leaves behind these limits, and craft your own map to guide you as you embark into a wide-open landscape of relating. 

THIS COURSE IS PART ONE OF THE MONOGAMY DETOX PROGRAM, A COMPREHENSIVE SERIES OF THREE COURSES FOCUSING ON DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF UNPACKING MONO-NORMATIVITY AND STEPPING INTO RADICAL RELATING.

Each course can be taken individually, with 1 year of access to materials, or by registering for the complete Monogamy Detox Program, you gain lifetime access, meaning you can rejoin every time the courses are offered in the future.

What We Cover

This course unpacks the narratives of prescriptive and colonial models of Monogamy and the Nuclear Family, offering a robust framework for developing conscious, intentional, and trauma-sensitive relationships and community, inclusive of non-monogamy and conscious monogamy, through the Relationship Landscape model.

Topics we cover include:
The benefits and pitfalls of hyperindividualism as an escape from compulsory monogamy;
The qualities of  healthy, complex, interdependent relationships;
The four quadrants of the Relationship Landscape, and understanding our own unique needs, desires, and capacity in each;
Navigating limmerence and the 'necessary fantasy'.

Cost:

5 Week Course $320CDN (approx $235 USD or 200 Euros)
Course access = 12 months

I am committed to financial accessibility and offer low-income and Student/Hardship discounts for anyone who needs them. 
I trust you to be the best judge of what you can afford; those who can pay more help me offset my costs and keep subsidized rates available for everyone who needs them.

Low Income Rate (for anyone whose income is below living wage in their location): $272CDN (15% discount, approx $200USD or 170 Euros). 
Use discount code LOWINCOME when registering. 

Student/Hardship Rate (for anyone who is a student, living on government subsidies, or is otherwise experiencing financial hardship): $224 CDN (30% discount, approx $165 USD or 140 Euros). 
Use discount code STUDENT when registering.

2- and 3-part payment plans at subsidized rates are also available.  Please contact support [at] radicalrelating.ca
You can also register to participate in the full 8-month Monogamy Detox Program, which includes 2 additional courses. When you register for all three, you receive up to an additional discount (depending on payment plan), and additional benefits including life-time access and a life-time coaching discount.

Rewilding Relationships Is For You If:

  • You are ready to confront monogamy-centred expectations that you hold of your relationships
  • You want a new framework for relating that doesn't center on the ideals of the Nuclear Family, colonial and patriarchal expectations of relationships, hierarchy based on romantic and/or sexual connections, or heteronormative gender norms.
  • You have struggled with monogamy, or you recently ended a long-term monogamous or primary relationship
  • You want to include your friendships alongside romantic relationships as significant connections in your life
  • You're looking for trauma-informed approaches to growing community and chosen family, with particular focus on open/non-monogamous relationships and Relationship Anarchy.

Frequently asked questions

I read the book Radical Relating, how is this course different?

Thank you so much for reading my book! It's a comprehensive introduction to the work I do — but honestly, there was so much that I couldn't fit into the book, especially when it comes to the nuances and specifics of what an individual journey out of monogamous mythology can hold. 

This course builds on the foundations and frameworks in the book, but what really sets it apart is that we get to do the work together, in live group calls, and integrating somatic practices as we go. 
Plus, you get to engage with other people doing this work.

If you're the kind of person who likes to learn by doing and talking about what you're doing,  and you want to have other people to do it with, then the course is going to offer you so much more than the book does — but the book is definately a good start!

I can't make all the live calls. Will they be recorded?

The live group Zoom calls are on Sundays at 10am Pacific Time and will last 90 minutes. Calls are recorded and will be uploaded to the coursework page within 24 hours of the call. While attending the calls live is ideal, it is totally okay if you need to miss a few.

Is this a Non-Monogamy Course?

Yes and no. 

It's not envisioned as an introduction to non-monogamy, but if you're new to non-monogamy and you're wanting to tackle the ways you might have internalized monogamous narratives, then the work in this course will definitely support you. 

I don't want to be non-monogamous, can I still do this course?

Absolutely!
Whilst the language used in the course is non-monogamy-centred, everyone is welcome.
The frameworks, skills, and practices that we explore are applicable for all kinds of relationships.

What do you mean that this course is "somatic"?

Somatics is a bit of a 'catch-all' term for various practices, modalities, and frameworks that focus on integrating mind, body, heart, and spirit. I'm trained in Somatic movement and am also a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner.

How this shows up in my courses is that the curriculum is structured to be gentle and supportive for nervous systems learning new ways of being. It also means that the content we're exploring is inspired by somatic practices and frameworks.

On a very practical level, the coursework will invite you to engage in gentle somatic practices, such as visualization, movement (within your comfort and capacity), and tracking your nervous system and its responses. 

While many somatic practices have been inspired by indigenous animistic and wisdom traditions, and my own practice of somatics is grounded through my personal animistic path (through Shaivism), I teach somatics through the language of modern somatics while seeking to honour the lineages through which I've studied, and by which these practices have originally come to us.

I'm asexual/aromantic and/or don't desire anything like traditional partnership or dating. Is this a good course for me?

Yes! Especially if you have struggled to feel supported or understood in these aspects of how you relate. 

What are your subsidy and payment plan options?

I believe this work can't truly be radical if it's inaccessible to those experiencing hardship or who are struggling financially. 

I don't need to see any proof of need: I trust each person to be their own best judge of their finances. 

Low Income individuals (whose income is below living wage where they live) can use the code LOW INCOME for a 15% discount on the full purchase price. 

Individuals who are full time students with loans, living on government benefits, unable to work due to disability, or experiencing more extreme financial challenges, can use the code STUDENT for a 30% discount on the full purchase price. 

There are 2 and 3 part payment plans available at the full rate. 
If you would like to pay on the Low Income or Student/Hardship rate on a payment plan, please send a message to support [at] radicalrelating.ca 
I entered this course feeling insecure, unsure, and lost when it came to identifying what I need and want, not to mention feeling very isolated and alone in those desires. I left with a rich community of likeminded friends, a strong awareness of what I want out of my relationships, and so much more confidence in the entire topic and relationships in general. I can't thank Mel enough!

— ANON COURSE STUDENT

2026 Course Dates:

Coursework goes live on Thursdays
Live Group Calls are on Sundays at 10am Pacific Time/1pm Eastern
Check Your Local Timezone Here

All calls are recorded, and posted to the coursework page.

Course Starts April 23rd

WEEK ONE: Unravelling Mononormativity
Coursework: Thurs April 23rd
Live Group Call: Sunday April 26th

WEEK TWO: The Relationship Landscape
Coursework: Thurs April 30th
Live Group Call: Sunday May 3rd

WEEK THREE: Moving At The Speed of Trust
Coursework: Thurs May7th
Live Group Call: Sunday May10th

WEEK FOUR: Mapping Your Landscape
Coursework Thurs May 14th
Live Group Call: Sunday May 17th

WEEK FIVE: Orgies With The Universe
Coursework: Thurs May 21st
Live Call: Sunday May 24th

Please note, this course is not for you if:

  • You are uncomfortable doing self-reflection;
  • You are currently experiencing a relationship crisis and have no other means of emotional support (eg therapist, family, friendship network);
  • You are trying to force yourself to be non-monogamous for the sake of a partner;
  • You believe there are only two genders or that racism doesn't exist;
  • You aren't ready to examine the ways you experience power and privilege due to your gender, orientation, or relationship status.
A thriving community

500+ people worldwide

Your work has reminded me that perhaps there isn’t anything wrong with me at all. I am amazed at the deep levels of shame we carry as human beings because we don’t fit into the construct that is given to us as a model for our life. It feels exciting because I can now explore what I want for my life rather than be gifted something that just doesn’t feel right for me.
Craig, COURSE STUDENT
 I am very thankful for the ability to apply what I have learned from participating in your program. Not to say that I wasn't hit with a variety of emotions. Absolutely, I was . Navigating through them and understanding that they are part of the hangover helped me to move to a great place of genuine joy...

ANON COURSE STUDENT
If you're in a relationship, starting a relationship, or ending a relationship, you owe it to yourself to check this course out. It opened my eyes to the possibilities, and gave me some valuable insights into my own relationships — to other people, to the planet, and to myself. I'll be dipping into this material for as long as I'm around.

 ANON COURSE STUDENT

The Values Of The Monogamy Detox Program

Because how we do this together is just as important as what we do together.
  1. The Monogamy Detox courses take an interesectional lense that recognises compulsory monogamy as a cultural institution is rooted in patriarchal, colonial, and capitalist narratives.
  2. Freely chosen dyadic (two people) and fidelitous partnership is not inherently bad.
    People exploring conscious monogamy are welcome here. 
  3. We consider how the upholding of Monogamy — and especially of the Nuclear Family through the 20th century thru to today — alongside heteronormative gender roles and a lack of mental health support, creates a fragile relationship ecology, leaving us more reliant on colonial systems for survival.
  4. These courses offer a feminist, anti-racist, queer & trans-affirming space, with room for compassionate dialogue and the space to be gently challenged and learn about the ways compulsory monogamy and systems of oppression intertwine.
  5. The content of The Monogamy Detox courses is free from the use of generative AI, and always will be.
You have created something truly magnificent here. I was impressed not just with the coursework, but by your ability to integrate intersectional awareness for marginalized groups. It was fantastic to see the diversity of the group that you attracted, which speaks to the work that you are doing to do so. It felt like a profoundly safe space and I enjoyed myself immensely.
— ANON COURSE STUDENT

What You'll Get From This Course:

  • You'll recognize the unhelpful stories about relationships from monogamy that you didn't even realize have been holding you back;
  • You'll move from a model of relating that centers on escalation and into a model that focuses on cultivating diverse relational connections;
  • You'll identify your needs in the four dimensions of intimacy and relationships;
  • You'll discover how to navigate your relationships at the speed of trust;
  • You'll be empowered to cultivate your own diverse landscape of relating, one where you can show up as your whole, authentic self.
A thriving community

what past students say:

I was hesitant at first —I didn't specifically identify as poly, but this class is NOT just for polyamorous people. Honestly, I think everyone that has ever been in a relationship would benefit from this class!
I feel like a relationship superhero now and I've made so many meaningful friendships through the class. There is no question, this class was a valuable life changer, for me.
ANON, COURSE STUDENT
This course has been life-changing for me. The self-worth and confidence I have gained ... is evident to those around me. I am so happy to know that I will be able to access the tools in the future as I continue my self-discovery and whatever challenges that may bring. This course has helped me to increasingly value myself

CARRIE, COURSE STUDENT
For a long time I was stuck in a contradiction: believing in the free expression of love, while at the same time lacking an explicit and thoughtful critique of toxic monogamy culture that undermines those very values.
Mel’s Monogamy Detox helped clarify the goals and values that guide my relationships, so I can live a more authentic life.
ANON, COURSE STUDENT

My Journey From Escalators To Landscapes

I got married when I was 22 because I thought that was what you were supposed to do when you were 22 and in love, and wanting to start a grown-up life.

I didn't know it at the time, but I was on the Relationship Escalator — and succeeding at it, way sooner than many of the friends I'd grown up with! I should have felt like I was on top of the world, but I didn't.

Instead, I felt trapped, miserable, and struggled to find joy.

I had grown up between many different cultures, and the ones I felt most at home in were those that focused on community and extended family. Friends weren't treated as less important than partners, and 'extended family' included the people you chose as family just as much as those you were related to.

When I left my marriage after seven years and began exploring polyamory in earnest, I found that many people I met were still replicating the models of mono-normative relationships, either trying to manage being on multiple relationship escalators at one time, or treating the one person they shared that escalator with as more worthy or important than other partners.
 
When I learned the term "relationship escalator" (coined by author Amy Garhan), I began wondering: what exists outside this escalator?
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REWILDING RELATIONSHIPS

I began to imagine the opposite of this escalator as a landscape, an ecosystem that flourishes through a bit of trial and error — and can benefit from the loving tending of human hands and hearts.  I thought back to my experiences growing up and having multiple supportive relationships in the communities I was part of, and how in white-centric, western, and especially North American culture, these complex and deep relationship networks were challenging to find outside of cults, conservative religious groups, and alt relationship spaces. And even in alt relationship spaces (including queer and polyamorous spaces) the shared relationship often felt fuzzy and unclear.

When I started my relationship coaching practice I began exploring this idea of a relationship landscape with my clients, and later in the original Monogamy Detox Course that ran between 2017 and 2025. I worked on refining my understanding of what this landscape might include, and playing with frameworks that would be useful for anyone wanting to step off the escalator and journey boldly into their own relationship ecology.

At the same time, I began expanding my own conceptions of 'meaningful relationships' and moved from non-monogamy that focused on my dating life to relationships that centred around my friendships, and on building a meaningful community and an inter-dependent family of choice.

Today, the Relationship Landscape model offers a liberatory framework for re-imagining relationships outside the confines of monogamous narratives, and its one that I'm proud to say supports many different styles of relating: polyamorous, monogamous, and everything else in between!
A thriving community

More Praise For The Monogamy Detox Courses

This course will open your mind and your heart, no matter your relationship orientation. Can't recommend it enough!

ANON, COURSE STUDENT
I first took the class in spring 2020. The experience was like a seed planted in the garden that sprouted and continues to sink deeper roots and grow taller, reaching for the sun and remaining an important part of my relationship garden

— PAUL, COURSE STUDENT
The course content was so impactful. I am happily and healthfully partnered x 2, and
supported and fulfilled in ways I never really thought possible for
myself. Your course taught me so much about communication, awareness,
and generosity (for myself and others). 
ANON, COURSE STUDENT
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